DMs and text messages are not conversations with college coaches.
They are text exchanges that shows at least feigning asynchronous interest in recruiting you, but it by itself does not necessarily mean they're serious about you. At some point, the communication needs to shift over from being asynchronous digital DMing and emailing to real-time conversations in person over the phone or on Zoom. The more real time the interest is, the more real the actual interest is.I see a lot of players and parents making the mistake of making good initial contact with a coach, but then leaving the communications only on DMs on X or emails. As soon as you make contact with a coach on X, the idea is to try to get off X and see if they'll talk to you in more real time.
You might say to a coach, "Thanks so much for reaching out. I would absolutely love to play for you. Here's all my information. Would it be easier to connect sometime after 7 PM tomorrow or the day after on the phone? Here's my cell phone. I would love to talk even if only for a few minutes."
You sort of have to invite yourself to the party, and even if you're not sure if you're free the next day, just by proposing a specific date and time, you're focusing a coach's attention and doing a little bit more work for them. The less a coach has to think to recruit you, the more likely you're going to be recruited. DMing and emailing constantly and following up will not get you an offer exactly, but it'll make it much more likely that coaches will get back to you and reply to you and give you answers.
While there are players who have such a tsunami of talent that they couldn't help but have coaches reach out to them and recruit them, if you're reading this, odds are pretty good that that is not you. Most players will have to manage their recruitment and the communications of that recruitment on their own to some extent, even if you're really good. "Interest" is more of a sliding scale or spectrum than it is something you either have from coaches or you don't. On the low end of the spectrum, you have things like being followed on X, having a coach like your film on X, or having a coach like a DM that you sent on X. On the middle ground, you have things like coaches responding to you relatively consistently on X, or maybe a virtual junior day. On the higher end of the spectrum, you have things like having a coach's actual cell phone number, coaches consistently calling you, and going on actual visits.Of course, getting an offer that is committable is the highest end of the spectrum.
While I think well-meaning parents do want to help their kids out by managing their X account, sending out DMs as them, or sending emails out as their kid, this is not something that I would recommend. Your son or daughter needs to learn the valuable life skill of networking and reaching out to people who can say no to something they want. When I see a parent who is impersonating their kid on X or via email, the cover story is usually that they don't want Johnny to be so stressed out during their recruitment. But the reality is generally that the parent wants their child to be recruited more than their child does.
So in summary:
DMs are not conversations. Phone calls, Zooms, and visits are.
Your child should be the one sending out these messages. You can help edit them, but they should be the ones reading and replying to coaches directly.
Interest is not something you either have or you don't. It is much more of a spectrum than anything else with varying levels of interests.
Once you make contact with a coach via DM or email, your first job is to get that conversation off of DM or email and into a real time conversation.
That's all for now. When you think you're ready, please feel free to set up your strategy call today https://calendly.com/brendancahill_/strategy-call
Brendan
